It is, of course, common knowledge that our current President is a horrible man. A foreigner, raised in a radical madrasa by Communists, his sole purpose in life is to oversee the utter desecration and ruin of our fair republic and Christendom in general. Thank goodness we have staunch patriots like Rush Limbaugh to expose him for his many crimes (no longer solely theoretical—they are now scrawled in blood across the canvas of our victimized planet) so that the world may see Obama’s true face.

So what, might you ask, is the latest outrage? Sundered from its protective web of liberal fiction, it is this: not content to merely murder the innocent unborn, he targets kids for destruction.

“You know what we have learned about the Somali pirates… that were wiped out at the order of Barack Obama, you know what we learned about them? They were teenagers. The Somali pirates, the [pirates] who took a US merchant captain hostage for five days were inexperienced youths, the defense secretary, Roberts Gates, said yesterday, adding that the hijackers were between 17 and 19 years old. Now, just imagine the hue and cry had a Republican president ordered the shooting of black teenagers on the high seas.

They were kids. The story is out, I don’t know if it’s true or not, but apparently the hijackers, these kids, the [pirates], Muslim kids, were upset, they wanted to just give the captain back and head home because they were running out of food, they were running out of fuel, they were surrounded by all these US Navy ships, big ships, and they just wanted out of there. That’s the story, but then when one of them put a gun to the back of the captain, Mr. Phillips, then bam, bam, bam. There you have it, and three teenagers shot on the high seas at the order of President Obama.”

So according to Limbaugh, the president coldly ordered the murder of scared, hungry children who just wanted to go home to momma. As an added bonus, we also get to hear him complain about how unfair it is that Obama gets a free pass to shoot niggers but but a white man can’t. This, my friends, is plain and simple injustice, and he is surely right to complain.

Of course, just four days earlier he was bemoaning the inaction of the Navy, restrained by the limp, Socialist wrist of the military-hating Obama administration (never mind that the previous administration wasn’t exactly unleashing the dogs, either):

“This is not funny. But you have to laugh at a bunch of [pirates] in basically a lifeboat surrounded by US destroyers, which appear to be powerless. You have to laugh at this. All the [pirates] want is money… And Obama doesn’t want to get his hands dirty with this.”

“…here we have a bunch of [pirates] in basically a life raft, and they are surrounded by the armaments of the United States Navy and nothing can be done. “The Indian Ocean standoff between an $800 million United States Navy destroyer and four pirates bobbing in a lifeboat showed the limits of the world’s most powerful military”… This destroyer could wipe out this little [pirate] life raft, it could vaporize it. We’re not powerless in the sense the New York Times means it. Where we are powerless is in the sense of our will, ladies and gentlemen.”

Who would have thought that Obama could go from milksop to butcher in less than a week? Perhaps only the august Mr. Limbaugh, who traveled the same ground, but in the opposite direction, in the same time. I had no idea he was such a bleeding-heart pantywaist! Truly, these are interesting times we live in.