Is there such a thing as Adult-Onset Motor Dyslexia? Because I think I’ve got it. Lately it seems like there’s a crossed wire in my cortex that is turning every day into Opposite Day, at least as far as my hands are concerned. They seem to be diametrically opposed to my wishes.

This week I have pulled the following blunders:

• Kept a candy wrapper and thrown my keys into the trash
• Repeatedly switched to the wrong car key to start the car even though I had the correct one in my hand just a split-second before
• Poured myself a glass of milk, set it down on the counter next to a glass of old ice-melt water, then picked up the milk and pitched it into the sink
• Hung up on someone instead of hitting the hold button
• Typed my password in username fields, and vice versa

At this rate, they’ll be pulling a Dr. Strangelove routine any day now.

I was playing a round of TF2 CTF just half an hour ago as an Engineer, when suddenly I heard the achievement guitar riff play as I stepped onto my teleporter entrance. Startled, I looked down at the bottom of the screen to find that I’d gotten the achievement “Selfish Teleporter: Take your own teleporter 5 times in a round.”

Now, I’ve taken my own teleporters more than five times in uncounted rounds of TF2, so I knew it wasn’t some long-neglected General achievement. Intrigued, I did a quick Google search but found nothing. I searched the Steam forums. Nothing! Puzzled, I looked back at my list of achievements. It did not appear there under any category. Now, I’ve never heard of custom/server-specific achievements before, but that doesn’t mean they’re not out there. But I couldn’t find any mention of them on mod sites like FPSBanana. Of course, I didn’t think to take a screenshot.

So I’m wondering; has anybody else seen or gotten this achievement? Did Valve silently/accidentally roll out part of the upcoming but unfinished Engineer update?